Remember back when you had roommates and it was so easy to divvy up the chores list and make sure everyone paid their share of the bills? And if someone wasn’t pulling their weight, it was really clear, right? Everyone knew who the lame roommate was and a simple house meeting could nip it in the bud or that roommate would be finding a new place.

Or, remember back when you and your partner were just dating and you could easily split the bar tab or take turns taking each other out? Both o…

First-time dads, do you (or did you) ever feel like you’re unsure of what you’re supposed to even do in those first few weeks after bringing baby home?  

Do you (or did you) feel like you don’t even exist or that there’s not much reason for you to be around because the baby needs mom and mom is doing it all?

Every new parent will tell you that those first few weeks after the baby comes home are rough.  

We as a culture often focus on mom’s struggle during this transition. Even I sp…

Finding childcare for your little ones can be an incredibly overwhelming thing for new parents--especially if you are bracing yourself to go back to work for the first time.  

There’s so much to think about just logistically: the research involved, phone calls to make, interviews to conduct, budgeting to figure out, and so on. And when you factor in all the emotions that come with it--The guilt! Oh, the guilt!--it can almost feel like too much to handle on top of everything else you alread…

Ah, summer travel… Second maybe only to the Christmas/Chanukah season, this is probably the most popular time for travel. Vacations are always worth it--it’s great family bonding and relaxation time for parents, and little ones always have a blast when experiencing new things. But, let’s be honest: the traveling to and from our incredible family vacations is not always so restful. Or even pleasant. Whether flying or driving, the challenges often the same--keeping our little ones content and …

So often in my practice, I see women who are struggling with a loss of identity now that they're a mom. I also see many parents--both moms and dads--who feel like it just isn't feasible for them to continue certain activities. That it would be impossible for them to enjoy it, to focus, or do it the way they want to with a little one tagging along. It can feel very literally like a monkey on your back while you're trying to do your thing. Or, like you can't just lose yourself in the activity …

Fourth of July weekend will soon be upon us.  

This is a popular time for many of us to make lasting memories from barbecues to fireworks. For my family, this is typically vacation time and we all look forward to it every year.  

It is with this in mind that I want to talk about the importance of slowing down and just being present with our families. So easily, our lives can become a rapid pace of go-go-go. There’s school and work and extracurriculars and birthday parties. (Don’t even get…

First, a disclaimer: Some moms or birth parents choose to be single parents and others don’t get much choice in the matter. This post is absolutely not intended to discredit, cast judgment, or make any single mother or birth parent feel bad about their circumstances or decisions. I strongly believe that we as parents are the best-qualified people to make the right choices for us and our families and sometimes that means doing it without a partner. Single parents, whether by choice or chance,…

Father's Day is just days away, so in honor of all the World's Best Dads everywhere, I thought I'd share my best tips for new dads (and parenting partners) so that you can come into your own as a daddy. I think it's often assumed that dads will just step up after the baby arrives (and more often than not, YOU DO!), but we all say it so casually--as if it isn't just as disorienting, confusing, challenging, or exhausting for dad as it is for moms. 

That really isn't fair, is it? 

Babies don'…

Parents and Parents-to-be, this is so good: Catherine O'Brien, LMFT was featured on the podcast "The Family Couch", hosted by Mercedes Samudio, LCSW. In it, they discuss what surprised Catherine the most when she first became a mom, how to make sure both parents are connecting with baby (and with each other) and feel supported and empowered, and they even take on the "mommy wars" hot-button issue to help moms move past the judgment and guilt. Catherine gives the top three questions she asks ev…

There’s possibly nothing worse than an inconsolable little one in the middle of a meltdown. It can be heartbreaking and infuriating at the same time. And if you’re in a public place, it can be downright mortifying at times.

For what it’s worth, momma, EVERY mom has these moments.  

Babies and toddlers don’t care if you’re a celebrity or are on the phone or have already had a rough day. So, don’t feel too bad if it happens in public and don't let it make you feel like a bad parent!

Not all of us win the lottery when it comes to kids and car rides. Some parents love driving their babies or kids around because they’re guaranteed to knock out during the ride. Other parents, not so much.  

If your baby screams as if they’re being tortured during any drive or if your toddler gets carsick, I know how traumatic it can feel for you, momma. I have two kids and they are like night and day when it comes to personalities. Their reactions to car rides….also like night and day.…

Since it’s generally Spring Break time for many of us this time of year, I thought I’d focus on some thoughts on traveling with little ones and some hacks to make it easier. Plus, summer is coming, so it can’t hurt to plan ahead for your upcoming summer trips.

First of all, I know that traveling with a little one seems daunting, but really, it’s not so bad. You’ll figure out your own system and your own travel hacks (which I’d love to hear!).

And secondly, just do it. Do it now, whil…

Like it or not, we live in a technological age. And, while there are definitely some hazards that come with that, there’s no denying the advantages.  

Since many of us use smartphones anyway these days, I thought it might be helpful to compile a list of apps that might make your life as a parent a bit easier. Now, by no means does anyone necessarily need ALL of the apps listed here. Just pick and choose the ones that suit your lifestyle and discard the rest. And, hopefully, this at least…

Whether you are pregnant, have a new baby or even an older child, we moms all can feel touched out at certain times in our parenting adventure. I especially hear about this from breastfeeding moms.

If you’ve already been there, then you know exactly what I’m talking about. The baby wants to do nothing but nurse. Or be rocked in your old rocking chair. Or will only sleep if she’s lying on your chest.  The toddler wants to be picked up all the time. Your child is having a clingy phase or a pr…

“When will we have a sex life again after the baby is born? And will it be any good?”

I hear this a lot from expecting parents, both with the couples I work with and in Facebook groups online. I’d venture to guess there are plenty more that are wondering the same things, but haven’t been brave enough to ask. Every new or expecting parent wants to know what’s normal.

The answer is there is no normal per se.   

(Of course, if you like numbers, you can get statistics here and some more h…

A couple of weeks ago, I posted about stress and the brain. In it, I talk about the limbic system (our “reptilian brain” that controls our emotions) and the five main ways to impact its response to stress.  

Of those five ways--aromatics, breath, nature, nervous system and energy work--the fastest way to invoke calm in the limbic part of our brain is by literally following our noses. This is effective because the olfactory nerve--the part of our anatomy that correlates to our sense of sme…

Isn’t it crazy just how much we need to do, think about, and plan for when we are expecting a baby? It is an amazing time, but it is also a life-altering, world-changing event.

If you are an expectant parent you are probably already inundated with books, research on the best products, and get loads of unsolicited advice. (And if you're not yet, just wait....)

There are a million books (ok, maybe not a million, but an overwhelming amount) out there for expecting and new parents. Pregnan…

I recently read another blog by a friend, colleague, and brilliant business coach, Jo Muirhead. In it, she talks about reflecting on the past year. As I read it, my most immediate thought was that I had accomplished nothing over the year. I had big goals that went unmet.  

And then one of the questions jumped out at me and honestly, brought tears to my eyes: “What were you doing?”

Last January, I had big goals. I planned to launch an online course, start some new workshops, and hire an…

Ah, self-care. This is something that takes constant work to master. (Does anyone ever really "master" it?) Sometimes I'm great at it. Other times, not so much. And when I fall out of the habit, I have to bring my attention back to it (sometimes after my husband calls me out on it!) and work it back into my routine. 

If you haven't already noticed that our roles and methods as parents are constantly changing, you will soon enough. Babies and kids are great at keeping us on our toes! So, a…

“Your life is over after having a baby.”

“Say goodbye to your free time!”  

“If you think your wife nags now, just wait till the baby comes....”

Whoa! That sounds awful.

And yet, I hear statements like these from new and expecting parents all the time: These are the things they’re hearing from others. They tell me all about their fears that their lives--their relationships, their true selves--are effectively over after the baby arrives, and they feel their fears are validated by the hor…

The other day, I was so tired I just couldn’t get out of bed. I knew I really needed to get going because I had to wash my hair before work and get myself ready before getting my kids up to take my daughter to preschool. But I just couldn't move. And then, I heard those little footsteps coming down the hallway….  

Sh$t!!  

After spending several minutes cuddling, I hurried into the shower while my husband got breakfast ready. The rest of the morning was a rush and I tried to throw lunches …

IN HONOR OF MATERNAL MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS MONTH THIS MAY, WE WILL BE FEATURING GUEST BLOGGERS, EACH OF WHOM BRING THEIR OWN UNIQUE EXPERTISE AND PERSPECTIVE TO THE DISCUSSION.  IT IS MY HOPE TO HELP EDUCATE AND NORMALIZE THE EXPERIENCES OF ALL MOMS.

Guest Blog Post: How to Capture More of Those Magical Parenting Moments

BY Amanda J. Zaidman, LCSW

A few years ago when my children were smaller I remember reading an amazing blog post about how sometimes in the middle of all the chaos and th…

IN HONOR OF MATERNAL MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS MONTH THIS MAY, WE WILL BE FEATURING GUEST BLOGGERS, EACH OF WHOM BRING THEIR OWN UNIQUE EXPERTISE AND PERSPECTIVE TO THE DISCUSSION. IT IS MY HOPE TO HELP EDUCATE AND NORMALIZE THE EXPERIENCES OF ALL MOMS.

Guest Blog Post: Dads Who Survive Pregnancy Do These 5 Things!

BY SHAMYRA HOWARD, LCSW-Therapist

Pregnancy can cause a lot of feelings for the expectant mom, but it can be equally stressful for the dad-to-be. If you’re an expectant dad who’s w…

I recently had a conversation with another mom and, because we both have daughters about the same age, we began sharing stories about when we were expecting.  

She was telling about how obsessed she was with birth plans, natural births, and everything Ina May Gaskin had written about. She told me she watched The Business of Being Born three times on her own, on top of making her partner and all of her other pregnant friends watch it with her too.  

She said it wasn’t until she went on mate…

Are you the type of partner who likes to point out all the things that your partner isn’t doing just the same way you do them? Or are you the one that gets nit picked to death? 

Hi, I'm Catherine O'Brien at HappyWithBaby.com and today I’m going to talk about some ways that you can help fix this. 

So let me give you a scenario… this just happened to me this week: I tend to be the nitpicker. For instance, I pick up my son from school every single day. I know the fastest route. I know which r…

I'm Catherine O'Brien of HappyWithBaby.com and this is a common complaint or concern that I get when I'm working with couples in my practice here in Sacramento and in workshops and other classes and events that I do.  

The thing is: we all get crabby and we all get irritable and we get frustrated and we might say something that doesn't come out of our mouths the right way.  

The fact is, you n…

Do you ever get upset or frustrated that you then say or do something that you totally didn't mean to do and you feel really bad?  

Hi, I'm Catherine O'Brien at HappyWithBaby.com and today I'm going to share a couple of quick tips for what you should do when you mess up. Because we all do.  

We all have those moments when we're overly tired, or we're in a hurry and maybe we say something that comes out the wrong way and upsets our partner or maybe even our own child.  

First of all, the n…

Are you struggling to find time for your partner now that you have a baby?

I'm Catherine O'Brien at HappyWithBaby.com and I know this reality all too well, both personally and professionally. Today, I just have one quick tip.  

It seems really simple and you might ask yourself, "Why haven't I thought of that before?" 

Watch Here

Basically, it is to schedule a date night or a date afternoon or a date morning coffee--whatever it is--and have it set at a regular time every week, when you ha…

So much has changed in the last seven years.

I used to work a lot. In fact, seven years ago, I was working three jobs that were all part-time, but the hours equaled to having two full-time jobs. I was eagerly awaiting the arrival for maternity leave to start because I couldn’t wait to take a break!

Did you hear that? Yeah, I thought being on maternity leave meant I would be on an extended vacation. The sad thing is I know I’m not alone in that. 

Anyway, I had planned to have a week off be…

OMG, moving with kids is not easy.

I remember a time when I could be moved and unpacked in one weekend….Oh, the good old college days!  

It is definitely not the same with a husband and two kids. The end of 2015 was exhausting. We sold our home and moved into our new place. And, of course, the holidays are always a busy time. But, I can finally say we are all sleeping happily in our new rooms.

So, what’s the point of my little story?  

Well, of course, it goes back to some of the same thi…

Recently, I’ve had the honor to be interviewed and featured in a two-part article series published on Psych Central. The articles focus on ways for new parents to maintain connection with their partners during the intense transition period that happens when you bring home a new baby. 

Part One, 4 Pointers for New Parents for Maintaining a Healthy Marriage, focuses on the importance of developing a Postpartum Plan for expectant parents, ways to delegate tasks and ask for help in the day-to-d…

My daughter loves her older brother.

She really adores him and I love to watch their sweet interactions together. Whatever he does she wants to do. This includes doing silly things, eating foods, making their beds, showing off some recent talent. This also includes wanting to play with all his toys--something he’s not always a fan of.  

I sometimes find myself telling him, “Just let her play with it!” as I hear him start to yell at her to stop.

“Don't yell at her!” I scream from the other …

There is so much we do to prepare for our sweet baby's delivery. But what have you done to prepare for after baby comes home? Watch the video as I share our poor planning for our first child. FYI, it doesn't have to be that way. (Don't have time to watch a video...read the transcript below!)

Watch Here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=62PgO4RnChY&w=640&h=480

It's been six years since that fateful day; the day that I think really changed so much for me and the way I look at things and the …

Do you ever feel like there's something wrong with you because you have this beautiful baby and everyday doesn't feel like it's the best day? Let me just tell you: that is so normal. Hear my thoughts on it in this week's video. 

Watch Here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5SEII9MGzE&w=640&h=480

I know, people always say, "Oh, enjoy every moment." 

But quite frankly, how in the world do you enjoy every moment? 

And I know so much mom guilt comes up because it's hard and our feelings are a…

Life transitions seems to be happening everywhere.  

I have friends who kids are off to college, someone I know is getting ready for retirement, some are welcoming new job positions, new babies, a new sibling added to the the mix. And then, there is the new school year. So many kids have already started. My son started back 2 weeks ago, but this week is is first full week--he's in 1st grade. 1ST GRADE!!!!!! How in the world is that even possible? I don’t know.  

And, though there are times…

We’re moving.

Well, hopefully, we’re moving. We’re putting our house on the market.

I told my husband last night that I’m scared of not knowing exactly what is to come. I’m sad that this part of our life is ending, but also excited to see what this new phase brings us.

I’m not sure what’s going to happen. What our next house is going to look like, if it will be set up the way I want, or whether we will have to adjust any expectations we are trying not to have. While my overwhelming feelin…

 Starting a weekly series for the rest of May. These are just quick interviews with different mommas (a different 1 or 2, each week).  

What I love about them, is that they are all amazing moms with different answers.  

Not one is better than the other.     

They are perfect examples of how different and unique we all are, but wonderful just the same.

Watch Here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VsnbL4vyRqQ&w=560&h=315

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