self-care

New & Expecting Parents, Here's My Question to You for 2019!

Ah, there’s something about a new year that always feels like a clean slate.  Even if you’re not a resolution-setter.

But, if you think about it, each new day is also a clean slate.

I’m a big fan of keeping things simple.  

So, even though today I have a really big question to ask you, when you actually put the question to practice in your day-to-day, the answer is really in the small, simple things you do each day.

Top 5 Excuses Moms Say about Why They Don't Practice Self-Care

Confession time, mommas.  Sometimes self-care is really hard to be consistent with.  Even for a therapist and mom like me.

I think we all struggle with this one--at least from time to time, if not all the time.

And when we fall off the wagon with it or have struggled to implement new self-care habits in the first place, the hardest part is starting.

It’s kind of like--well, I don’t know about you, but this is definitely true for me:  Getting to the gym is the hardest part of exercising. If I can just get myself there, then I’m fine.  I’ll find something healthy to do for myself. But leaving the house? Oh, so hard.

3 Real Self-Care Tips All Moms Need to Hear

I talk about self-care a lot.  Like, A LOT, a lot. And it’s not just me.  Self-care became a buzzword years ago and it doesn’t show any signs of disappearing anytime soon.

I think this is a good thing… and a bad thing.

It’s great because we would all do better to slow down and tune into ourselves a little more often to ask, “What do I need right now?” But, it’s also kind of a bad thing because there’s so much misunderstanding about what self-care really is.  


Are You Spending Enough Time with Your Kids?

More and more, I hear from moms that they worry they aren’t spending enough time with their kids.  

And, I mean, it makes sense.  Many of us moms work, which means someone else is doing the caregiving for a significant portion of the day.  And then, we come home and it’s boom-boom-boom. We have to do the whole dinner, bathtime, bedtime routine, with the rush hour commute in between.  It often feels like there isn’t much time to “just be” with our kids.

But, it’s not just working mothers.  Stay-at-home moms feel it too.

Confessions of a Marriage Therapist: 2017 Reflections

I don’t know about you, but I’m still riding high on new year’s vibes.  I’m so excited for what’s in store this year and am feeling really optimistic about what this year will bring for all of us.  One of the ways that I like to welcome the new year and honor myself for what I’ve lived through in the past year is to do a yearly reflection.  (I posted a blog about this last January.)  This helps me to really think about all the things I actually did do in the last 12 months, and not get discouraged by all the things I didn’t do.  And to kick things off for us this year, I made a short video telling you about how I was introduced to this practice and why I think you should try it too.

PLUS, a FREE DOWNLOAD INSIDE!

Video: Confessions of a Marriage Therapist "Goals & Feelings"

This week's video is all about how, after I had run myself ragged as a mom, I finally learned to focus on how I want to FEEL over what I want to accomplish. 

 

In it, I tell you about my 3 favorite ways to start focusing on the right things.  With some practice, these habits will help you to naturally create your ideal day. 

How to Parent When Your Heart is Broken

Parenthood is never easy, even when life seems perfect.  And those times when life is not so perfect?  Harder.  And those times when loss, tragedy or trauma happen?  The hardest.  Lately, it’s hard to listen to the news log onto social media.  It seems like there’s a new natural disaster or political mess every single day.  It’s starting to feel normal, even though we know nothing about any of this is or should be normal. 

With details about the Las Vegas Shooting coming out nearly a week later (and will probably continue to roll out in the weeks and months to come), we might be in for a rough emotional ride.  Especially because of how particularly senseless or inexplicable this event feels.  Especially especially if you know someone was there or otherwise feel some connection to that particular place.  

Dear Momma, Your Priorities are Skewed!

Dear Momma,
Your priorities are skewed!

Now, honestly, I mean that in the nicest way. Because if you’ve met me before you know that saying something direct and possibly hurtful is not my style.  But I feel like if I don’t tell you, then I can’t continue to sit back and watch you be miserable and continue to let you commiserate.  Because momma, you are so focused on what isn’t right that you aren’t noticing the positive.

7 Things All Moms Should Know About The Brain to Get Control Over Their Stress

There is nothing quite like motherhood to make you feel like you’ve lost control or that you’ve met your limit, right?  Often times, motherhood can feel joyful, meaningful, boring, stressful, exhausting….all in one day.  I think ideally we’d all like to feel more joy and meaning than stress and exhaustion though.  And, thankfully, there are actual things you can do to make sure you feel more ease and can enjoy the positives more. 

New Year's Reflections: What we're actually accomplishing when we're not meeting our expectations.

I recently read another blog by a friend, colleague, and brilliant business coach, Jo Muirhead.  In it, she talks about reflecting on the past year.  As I read it, my most immediate thought was that I had accomplished nothing over the year.  I had big goals that went unmet. 

And then one of the questions jumped out at me and honestly, brought tears to my eyes:  “What were you doing?”

Read more and get a FREE BONUS DOWNLOAD.

The Challenges of Practicing Self-Care as a Parent: A Q&A with Catherine O'Brien LMFT on PsychCentral

Ah, self-care.  This is something that takes constant work to master. (Does anyone ever really "master" it?)  Sometimes I'm great at it.  Other times, not so much.  And when I fall out of the habit, I have to bring my attention back to it (sometimes after my husband calls me out on it!) and work it back into my routine. 

Finding Your Calm

There is so much to be excited about when you're expecting a baby. All the new little outfits and room decorations.  Who is this little creature going to be like?  Will they have your laugh?  Will they have your partner’s knack for numbers?  Will they have blue eyes or green? Will their hair be curly or straight?

And then, they arrive.  

1st Grade?? How did THAT happen?

1st Grade??  How did THAT happen?

Life transitions seems to be happening everywhere.  I have friends who kids are off to college, someone I know is getting ready for retirement, some are welcoming new job positions, new babies, a new sibling added to the the mix.  And then, there is the new school year.  So many kids have already started.  My son started back 2 weeks ago, but this week is is first full week--he's in 1st grade.  1ST GRADE!!!!!!  How in the world is that even possible?