The Momma Interviews is a new blog series by Catherine O'Brien, LMFT highlighting the thoughts, experiences and wisdom of a unique real-world mom each week, to normalize and validate the struggles and triumphs that are a part of the universally human experience of motherhood for women everywhere.
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This momma doesn't worry about any balancing acts. She simply dives into each of her roles with her whole heart... one day at a time. With help from her fiancé, Kaitlin is able to handle the 'impossibilities' of motherhood.
Here's her interview:
How do you balance the mom, work, and relationship roles?
I don't believe you can ever really balance all of those aspects. You have to pick which role you want to work on that day/moment and jump in head first.
Most moms I speak to say there are moments when they are ready to throw in the towel. Can you describe a time you felt this way? What got you through it?
When I was pregnant with my, now 4 month old, son and working and trying to keep up with my 7 year old and housework, I think I was kicking that towel. My really amazing fiancé always let me vent and took care of things when he knew I was in over my head but didn't want to ask for help. I didn't want to look weak, so he helped all along the way without me needing to ask.
What do you do when you feel overwhelmed, overstretched, or less than?
Honestly, I "veg" out in front of the TV or in a hot bath. I've gotten to the point where I don't feel mom guilt anymore when I need some me time.
I've had parents tell me that one of the hardest things about being a parent is the comparisons and judgements from other parents. How do you personally cope with that?
I've never been someone who needs approval from others in the things I do, especially with my children. If it works for us and isn't harming them or anyone else then others' opinions are void. I research and ask advice from people I trust and that gives me the confidence I need as a mom.
What is the great lesson you've learned as a mom?
Your house will never be clean for longer than a day.
What is your favorite quote that inspires you as a mom?
"You go through big chunks of time where you're just thinking, 'this is impossible - oh,this is impossible'. And then you just keep going and keep going, and you sort of do the impossible." -Tina Fey
What is your favorite song that inspires you as a mom?
"Let It Be" by the Beatles. Basically I feel like it's saying your mom will always be there to give you advice and love you. I want my kids to always know this.
What is the one piece of advice you'd like to give to other moms?
You know what's best for you and your child(ren). Do it. Do it with all of your being.
What do you feel is your greatest personal struggle with the experience of motherhood?
I have trouble letting my oldest be carefree sometimes. I am very introverted and she is just the opposite. When she sings or dances or makes crazy faces while standing in line at the grocery, it takes everything I have in me not to tell her to stop. But it's also why I admire her so much!
How has your relationship with your partner changed? How has it stayed the same?
It has changed in that we haven't had as much alone time, especially with an infant. But it has also allowed us to love each other more deeply because we understand what it means to be parents and put someone else's life before our own.
How has your relationship with your friends, family or support system changed? How has it stayed the same?
Everyone continues to be supportive and loving. The friends who don't have kids are still great about asking about my children and I try to not always make them the only topic of the conversation.
What is something that has surprised you about being a mom (i.e. something you didn't realize you'd enjoy, something you didn't know babies/kids did, something you didn't know could bring so much joy)?
I have a lot more patience than I gave myself credit for.
How many children do you have? (Include the special make-up of your family steps, adopted, guardianships, halves- or no details at all- up to you!)
2— a 7 year old daughter and a 4 month old son
Share your relationship status.
Engaged with no date yet